Ani!!!! You’ve described well the battlefield of the psyche. Your level of mindfulness, awareness, is outstanding. Mindfulness is a factor which is present from the commencement of practice to the completion and attainment of the spiritual goal (which may vary from student to student).  One needs to get all the weapons lined up and in tip top condition. We must keep fighting, keep watching and eventually one gets very skilled and refined in practice, not wasting energy but aiming and hitting targets with ease. We need sharp mindfulness teamed up with the axe of detachment. Also a steely resolve, patient endurance to back up our conviction in the practice. It can be done! Keep up the fight!