Thought came to my mind to frame the article and hang it to the wall.

Thought also came to the mind as I drove yesterday at around 6 pm and was listening to some ambient melodic vibrations, to observe how the self is isolated while that enjoyment or victimization was going on. I had to also accept to myself how the sensuality of vibrational melodies soothes some sentimental frustrations I am facing. Then, for a moment I tried to think about the idea of existing in total isolation from these senses, being just the self with no more access to these enjoyments.

And, the monkey brain took me to think about the importance of the circumstances I face, as far as understanding and evolving, in realization and relationship with material nature. I thought that it seemed ironic that intense frustrations of the most basic desires or instincts can also be most successful evolutionary experiences.

So, the position of the yogi hinges on accessible opportunities in addition to realized evolutionary success typically based on frustrated desired of accessed opportunities, or restraint from accessing them. The complete lack of such opportunities negates this acid test, the study of the outcomes of which can provide the means to observe the current evolutionary status.

Especially when these opportunities are being exquisitely frustrated I try to accept that my non-participation or inexistence really doesn’t change the course of the universe. Accepting this powerlessness feels like impotence, it is very hard to accept that based on my (male) ego, traditions, conditioning tied to class consciousness and sense of identity, etc…

However, one occasion at a time I can feel a great sense of relief from not feeling like I need to bear the weight of the world and the infinite dramas of its history. Any and all such events used to be inevitably crushing, more and more I am able to snap out and do some self reasoning, but only after the initial blow and internal mayhem.

Through these fortunes interpreted as frustrations I see an evolutionary position shaped in the subtle system and then manifesting in the physical. Therefore I need to look beyond the physical reality in order to successfully address the performance and its implications or the lack of them; this reality is only a medium, a means of acting or venting out the subtle contents. There will be new crop compulsively coming out of the soil for harvesting only because seeds have been planted in the fertile medium.