Sense of identity punctured by thought-energy
Meditationtime Forum Post
Date: Posted 3 years before Jul 17, 2016
MiBeloved 3 years ago
This morning during breath infusion, there was some special energy burst without kundalini being involved. This is the infused energy bursting out like fireworks from the place in the psyche where the energy was compacted and intensified.
One special occurrence was a burst which began in the neck, in the flesh part of the neck, then this spread to the temples and then to the central top part of the subtle head. This was not the brahmarandra crown chakra, this was below that chakra, and in a dimension in which the chakra is not present.
When the energy moved into the top part of the subtle head it was like very tiny ice crystals with mild camphor bliss all bunched like a snow cone of ice compacted but without a freezing feeling.
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During this meditation there was another experience which was very informative in terms of knowing how the buddhi intellect orb reconnects with the core-self when the core-self is in naad sound and is isolated from the buddhi intellect influence.
Once the core-self inserts itself completely into naad sound, it no longer has any perception of what is happening in the front part of the subtle head. For that matter, in real terms nothing happens there at that time but on occasion for one reason or the other, there might be interference arising in that front part.
When the core-self is in naad sound without any contact with the buddhi, it feels as if it is alone there.
Aloneness (not oneness).
Being there in a singular unit form pervaded on all sides by naad vibration.
Then even though the core self feels as if it is alone, it is actually there surrounded on all sides by the sense of identity (*ahamkara). The reason why it does not sense this sense of identity is due to the subtlety of the sense of identity energy, and also due to the core-self being accustomed to being fused to the sense of identity and identifying that fused composite as itself.
As I was in the naad sound, I found that there were about three strings like thought-calls. When I looked forward a little, I saw three strings of sounds like letters hanging in the mental sky.
Then I noticed that an orb moved closer to me but as it did so it stuck to the tip of a gel like crescent shape which was in the sense of identity which surrounded me (the core self).
The little orb which was about one quarter-inch in diameter was whitish but was also transparent. The gel like enclosure was also whitish.
The presence of the thoughts energy had caused the sense of identity to be punctured with crescent shapes. The buddhi intellect orb latched on to begin the operation of expanding and displaying thoughts.
Because I turned my back on it and returned into naad it disappeared.
This is a valuable experience, in seeing the buddhi intellect orb and the sense of identity visually and objectively.
