Love, Dreams and Marriage

Meditationtime Forum Post

Date:  Posted 6 years before Sep 27, 2018

MiBeloved 6 years ago

Email Inquiry:

What do you do in a situation, where you are having realistic dreams with a former lover? How do you stop these dreams from occurring? This person was married and has a son from her marriage but her husband passed on.

We were in a relationship some years back, after her husband was deceased. We considered getting married and almost did. Somehow it did not work out. Gradually the relationship chilled out but I still was attached to this person and the person to me. I moved on and got married and for all practical purposes, I am living happily ever after except that this former lover keeps showing up in my dreams off and on.

Recently she showed up at a family gathering in the astral. My relatives were badgering me about her, saying that I should have married her and that it would have worked out even though she was widowed with a son. The thing is that I am trying to figure this out, how you have so many attachments for so many people and then you can only marry one person by law. So what should a person do with all these feelings? It seems to me that there should be a way to deal with this. How does one control these astral meet-ups with past lovers and even with persons whom one is attracted to sexually after one gets married?

MiBeloved’s Response:

The first thing to do is to understand that you cannot absolutely control any of this. Your control of these relationships is limited to the access you get by providence. You cannot remember most of the details of your past life. Even great yogis must sometimes guess their way or surmise what the past life was with another person. This means that fate will not allow you to get the upper hand. Being content with that and then being open to your intuition, and doing regular meditation practice to make your mind more psychically responsive, will give you the maximum perspective in these situations.

Monogamy or polygamy is also controlled by providence. We see that currently monogamy is holding the world in its grip more and more. Recently about 3 years ago, by a favor of Dear Beloved, his mother and I were in Morocco, in Marrakesh. Being there was like going back in time, to the time when Persia was considered to be the center of the world. We had a tour guide for a day. I questioned the man, because his English was very good. I asked him about the situation there with marriage and multiple wives. He said it was being phased out, that the king of the country would be the last one to be allowed to have more than one wife.

I then asked him if he had more than one wife and he answered in the negative but he said that if he wanted to have more wives, he could get permission from an Imam to have up to four wives, even though the laws would soon change prohibiting that. One of the reasons why Gaddafi was overthrown was his resistance to the changes in the direction of monogamy. All the Arab rulers who resist that change will be disposed sooner or later because fate is moving everything in the direction of monogamy. If you fight fate, it will brush you aside as if you were a mere straw.

One way to look at this is to see that these are all different types of opportunities awarded by providence from time to time. You could see that monogamy is an advantage, just as polygamy is an advantage. If you understand that, then you won’t miss a beat but will instead just make the best use of opportunities.

It is like in America; nearly everyone has a big mouth about so much freedom. There is even freedom to have sex and get birth control when you are a teenager but in the same country, you are only permitted one legal spouse. So there is freedom but the government will not support you if you actually use the freedom and have more than one sexual partner in a declared way. You cannot claim more than one spouse on your income tax return. You cannot claim more than one spouse on your insurance policy. In America, freedom then really means limited allowance as defined by the government.

Regarding past lives, the same thing goes even if there is polygamy. Consider this, that you are living back in Persia before the time of Christ. It is tribal life. You are in a large tribe and in the ruling family. You have 2 wives and 98 concubines. So then what? How many more will you take? You only have one genital. How many more concubines can you service with that one instrument?

You can see that in all situations, that of having one and that of having more than one there will always be that limit. There will always be that point at which you cannot fulfill all desires from a past life.

So why bother about it? Just accept that fate is in control that all desires cannot be fulfilled in any given life. Some must be put on hold. Some must wait for another time.

You cannot absolutely control anything astral or physical. It is all under the rule of fate. The most you can do is to manage some of the events efficiently. Try to avoid circumstances which you cannot solve out in the present life but if fate persists and throw these events at you, then just manage it as best as you know.

Don’t run off with the New Age idea that you are God and you can control this. That is a good fantasy but it has no practical application, at least not in the long range.

Have confidence that you will meet this woman in some other life and then you can continue the love affair. In fact the best thing to do is to run away from this physically or astrally. How do you know what suffering this will cause you if you actually go with this lover again?

Everybody is carrying baggage and you do not know what is in the suitcase until it is opened. Suppose it contains a bomb. A pretty lady can carry a bomb just as well as a woman with ugly features can. How do you know what cultural baggage the lover has picked up since you knew her in some past life? Can you manage the explosion which will occur when that suitcase is opened?

Don’t lose any sleep over this. If you meet this person in the astral, just deal with it and move on because you are not in control of the astral existence now, nor in the past and you will not be in control of it in the future. We just try to manage our behavior in these situations which arise, and that is it. We cannot control this.

What you can control however is your thoughts which go out to this person. Do you think of this person much? Are you picking up radio waves from this person’s mind when this person is thinking of you? There, that is where you can do some controlling. If you shut down your thinking process about this person and detune your mind from the radio signals which come from this person, then that is how you can control this. But even then you cannot tell providence what to do. Don’t try to put a collar around providence’s neck. You are the one who is chained up by providence and it is not going to be the other way around ever. But you can control your thoughts and that will cause a great reduction in the energy which is feeding into your mind from this person.

If you must be with this person then:

Love her in another life!