Gurus and Favorites
Meditationtime Forum Post
Date: Posted 3 years before Nov 30, 2016
MiBeloved 3 years ago
The instance of gurus and their favorites is an age-old concern for disciples, especially for the ones who feel rejected or neglected.
Why is it that certain disciples get more from a guru? They are given more grace, more attention, more everything, while others who serve the guru fittingly are neglected, rejected and not given due care and attention.
In the Puranas there are many stories of guru preference. For instance there is the story of Kach who took instructions from Shukra, a great guru from Vedic times. The problem was that Kach belonged to an opposing dynasty. Shukra’s disciples did not like that Shukra should teach Kach technical matters.
Shukra not only taught Kach but was fond of him. In fact Devayani, Shukra’s daughter was in love with Kach, though Kach fended her off successfully. If everything is equal, if every entity is equal to another, then how is it that someone has more luck than another, and gets more grace energy from the guru than another.
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Sometimes we find that a spiritual master gives information in the presence of a certain disciple and then clamps shut as soon as that disciple is not present. The other disciples then feel that they are regarded as not being fit for the information by that guru. They even develop resentments and may challenge the guru as being too affectionate to that special disciple.
Why does this happen. If the guru is really there for everyone, and if he treats everyone equally, then why does he give more information in the presence of only certain disciples?
There is a story which might help us to look at this in an objective way. That is the Ramayana story of Rishyashringa. He was living in the forest with his father who was a Vedic rishi. A king by the name of Romapada heard that Rishyashringa was a good luck charm in reference to rainfall.
Apparently anywhere Rishyashringa lived had seasonal rains. The country of King Romapada was in a prolonged drought. He was advised to bring good luck Rishyashringa to Anga country. Once Rishyashringa was relocated to Anga, rain poured everywhere and the drought became a thing of the past.
If everyone is equal, then why it is that someone has good luck and another person has bad luck and cannot prosper no matter what he thinks or does?
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Sometimes when teaching a certain person, new yoga or meditation procedures spring to mind. Some of these I never did before and never divulged to anyone before, and did not even do for my own benefit. Why does that happen? What is behind that?
Some students sometimes criticize that I am partial to certain disciples, especially to new or recently-adopted students.
“You never taught me that, someone said, “I was your student for a long time. This new person is so much your favorite. What about the years for which I was a student of yours. It is obvious that you do not like me and have kept those techniques away from me. What sort of kind guru are you?”
Alfredo 3 years ago
Ha, ha, yeah.
I am one of those that resent you in my mind often. I often think that you are ready to comment on others' practices and slow to comment on mine, ha, ha, sounds familiar? Am a stupid? You betcha.
Neo_Yogi 3 years ago
MiBeloved:
(...) What sort of kind guru are you?
A human one.
devaPriya Yogini 3 years ago
Ha Ha Alfredo, you're funny, I like that you're always ready to claim yourself, no matter if it's good or not so good. Refreshing that you are so honest all the time.
Neo Yogi is right. As special and enlightened as gurus are, they are in human form and susceptible to favoritism.
I imagine it's for the same reasons that my first grade teacher favored this cute little outgoing, funny, smart, artistic and engaging girl in my class and not me or others. I remember being hurt silently that on the school room cupboards the teacher had drawn funny little pictures and included a picture of and salutation to this little girl and no one else. I still remember how that felt!!!
I was quiet, subdued and afraid to speak up when I was that age. I didn't have time to engage her, I had other things on my mind, she wasn't really my priority even though I was there everyday as her 'student'.
I did what she said, followed the rules, tried to act like I liked her well enough, but that's not what it took to be favored.
Miss Drake didn't mean to play favorites, it’s just that this little girl brought something out in her that she herself loved about her own self as a person and a teacher.
The little girl, like no other child in that room, made Miss Drake feel like a worthwhile, fun and loved teacher. She made her feel glad that she went into teaching and bothered with this room full of 6 and 7 year old brats. She made her feel like she really wanted to be there learning and not out of duty or appearance. Teachers, doctors, social workers and gurus too, like knowing that what they are doing is taken super seriously and cherished. They also resonate with and enjoy certain personalities. Who doesn't?
In college too, most of the class despised the "question asking students" who prolonged the professors class times with their incessant inquiries, making the rest of us wait to get the hell out of that room. We were being jerks thinking this way, thinking these students were being ass kissers, when in fact it's because they actually enjoyed learning this subject matter, so therefore they were favored because the teacher felt valued and enthused.
Those students possessed the spark of genuineness.
The teacher recognized the sincerity and that fostered fondness.
And then we would wonder why the teacher treated us differently??? Ridiculous.
Hypothetically neither are supposed to have favorites, but certain personalities between certain gurus and disciples, or certain first grade teachers and their little students just seem to bring out the best in each other and what is born is a new lease, freshness, appreciation for the profession/calling.
Like Neo said, they are still human even if they are really divine.
Im sure even in astral empires, favoritism is everywhere.
The great thing about certain guru's is that they actually see the living being and truly love that living being in every single being they encounter, not just their favorites.
Alfredo 3 years ago
Dear Gurubhai Yogini Ji!
Ha, ha, thank you so much, you are also so funny and nice.
With me, you know me well, the problem is that I can be funny, but then the "juvenile" part may possess me, and take me into the realm of the asshole in no time.
I often, while meditating, get all this good will and well-wishes coming from you. Right then and there I promise myself to tell you how much I like you, but as soon as the meditation wears off, I forget and cool off, so that now I came right away to the computer when I read your post before it wears off, to tell you, and wish you the very best with your Sadhana.
As for Michael Guruji, of course he is human, a special one though. He sometimes may play the Acharya a little, and that's fine. For example, he might show us that he is impartial and does not care specially for his children, or this or that, but he cares for them as any normal father would do, and will favor them, of course, in any way.
But I am not going to criticize him here or else he might not comment on my practice reports.
devaPriya Yogini 3 years ago
Thanks Alfredoji!! Feelings mutual!
You are honored for your dedication, consistency, humor and attitude.
And believe me, there is a juvenile part of myself that I continue to work on!
In my opinion, there is something very right about anyone
who recognizes the brilliance of our precious guruji Michael Beloved
and I know you do with sincerity.
Observing the teachings, submitting to his instruction, transforming the way you clearly have
so whole heartedly, says much about who you are and what you want spiritually.
Im glad you can feel the good will I send with the southern winds....it's very real.
Alfredo 3 years ago
Dear devaPriya Yogini Ji!
I also took a little time to answer you, as you did, as your answer above first brought tears of joy to my eyes.
It took a few minutes, during an exchange in a LinkedIn group, to recognize the Acharya for what he is. Many people do not know, really, who he is. Some are fortunate to be under his shadow.
When you wrote: Im glad you can feel the good will I send with the southern winds....it's very real.
I know and can feel it alright, I have not the slightest doubt of its reality. Thank you.
unlimitedsun 3 years ago
This is just a reaction to the original post. In my opinion it all depends.
From the standpoint of the disciple it is an unfair discrimination. The same goes when the child asks for attention through a seemingly negative approach that is a tantrum. And as it's been said before the crying kitten gets more milk; it's about survival. So it makes for a fit/ astute kundalini shakti.
Crying/ competing for guru's attention however makes for a dumb or dominated kundalini; if it is a bonafide lineage then it is the demise of the kundalini in the long run. The disciple is best positioned with greed for advancement and that implies a certain spirit of competition; it is a positive drive especially if it will bring the teacher to deliver/ squeeze out more substance.
It is not about equal creation of anyone. I am not equal to no one, as my karma is unique; so I deserve a personal medicine (based on guru's expertise). In that sense even my path to salvation is personal and cannot fit everyone else, according to time and circumstance on the continuum. "What is good for the goose is good for the gander", not so! Spirituality is not a social wealthfare system.
As a disciple/ follower the more discriminated and personalized my prescription the better for me (I think) and the more individualized the deliverance from the teacher the better. My challenge is to espouse, to understand, to appreciate that discriminative quality in the model of instruction.
A good mother will respond to the calls of the young, as nature has guaranteed bonds that will maintain the survival. A responsible father or parent will keep in mind that treating the offsprings equally translates into discriminating love!
